I find new ways to love myself while I await your arrival. For it is only in loving myself more fully that I am able to receive your love more fully. So I diligently purge and clean while I wait.
The self-hatred lurks in the darkness of my fears. It feeds off of the perception of loneliness while savoring the morsels of worthlessness. It sucks the very essence out of my life; if I allow it.
Through Will and Valor, I walk through the shadows. It is in the void that I choose love and light over fear and darkness. Each time I walk through another shadow another illusion of the truth is shed. It is then that I open more fully into the Divinity of Love. As I learn to love myself more and more, the darkness is brought to the light and the lies are alchemized into the truth. All is Love.
It is in loving myself more completely that I am able to bring more light to the beacon that beckons you and one day brings you to my shores. Until we finally meet, I continue to gift myself lovingkindness, filling the voids with love and light. This is also my gift to you.
By loving yourself more deeply, you are able to follow the compass of your heart. As you gain and build trust you follow the direction of the fine needle that shows the way back to me. Believe not in the fog of your darkness, Lover. Those are just lies that others told you about yourself that you chose to believe. So now choose differently. You are not alone in this endeavor. I walk this walk with you, though currently it is (seemingly) in parallel.
Lover, I am here. Follow your truth and you will find me there.