This piggybacks on a post from January: Relationships & Running Shoes: if it doesn’t fit, don’t force it
***Just to be clear, the shoes represent the relationship in this analogy, not the partner***
When shoe shopping, we find shoes that work for us and many that do not (at least this has been my shoe shopping experience). When we find the right type of shoe and the right fit, we may decided to take those shoes home…
Later, we might find that the shoes blister, or they served their purpose to make us feel sexy for a hot date or to look smart for a job interview. We no longer need those shoes. So we let them go. Do we blame our feet (ourselves) for the failure of the shoes (the relationship) to work out? I doubt it if it’s shoes. I believe we all do if it’s the relationship.
Or what about the shoes that use to work and just no longer do? Expect injuries if you run marathons in worn out shoes (like long-running marriages that just no longer work).
Why the fuck do we do this torturous thing to ourselves with relationships? Why do we blame ourselves or our partners? Maybe we just need a new or different pair of shoes!
And maybe, just maybe, it’s ok to get shoes go when they no longer work for us (damn, though, I still regret getting rid of those Ox Blood Doc Marten’s!)
A few things to consider the next time you’re trying on shoes! Or feeling like a loser when the relationship no longer works for you…remember, it’s just like a pair of shoes!
Namaste
__/|\__ Metta
2016.02.10
Image: Google
Good advice. I’ll try to remember it daily as I struggle with the shame game. I also have some actual shoes that I have long since needed to part ways with. What once was a favorite and served me well may now be just simply cluttering up my life and leaving me to feel bad that they never get taken off the shelf any longer.
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You’re making my heart smile! Sounds like a good time to say bye to those shoes. Guilt-free! xoxo
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