The more we push off doing something for “later,” the more we build up a wall that then needs to be broken down. Pressure builds with each moment that we avoid doing something that we know will help us in some way. As such procrastination is also a passive-aggressive way to block love from ourselves.
Sometimes a perspective shift such as in “Motivation Through Punishment?” can be helpful. I find that “should” and “ought”statements build shame and guilt. So when I say to myself things such as “I really should/ought/need to do (this task),” that I often don’t want to even think about it.
What I have found that works better for me is to say, “It will help me to do (this task). I will feel better once I get started.” So often we wait and hold off doing something because we feel we need: more time, more energy, more motivation. Just as we need to push a button or turn the key in our car’s ignition, to “get motivated” we need to start with action. If we waited for the car to start itself, we’d never get anywhere in life.
Another aspect that can cause procrastination involves the belief that what we do needs to be perfect. Even just one tiny step towards starting a project can help break down barriers, allow room for mistakes. It’s better to start a walking program that lasts ten minutes than to couch surf and expect a change.
Sometimes we also tell ourselves, or make ourselves believe, that we must do the entire project at once. Commit to a small time frame instead. “I’ll do 20 minutes a day today and get this thing started,” can take off some of the pressure. After 20 minutes, you can then choose to continue, or you can set a time frame for another day or time, then stick to it!
The longer we wait, the more walls build and then we need to break down. Loving yourself is not just about breaking down walls, it’s also about not allowing yourself to continue to build barriers. So today, and everyday, let’s “lose ourselves” in the moment, you own it, you better never let it go. While I do believe we have more than one chance to get it right (even Eminem in this very song talks about trying again, and again), we only fail ourselves when we fail to try.
So what step can you take today to start a project? Write it down. Make it simple. Then do it! And remember to celebrate climbing the mountain you’ve created. You’ll love yourself more for it.
Namaste
Photo courtesy of suphakit73 at freedigitalphotos.net
Perfect reminder for me this morning, Tiffany. Makes me think of a quote an old boss had on his desk years ago, “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.”
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Haha! I almost included that one. One of my dad’s faves. Tho I also learned how to procrastinate from him, too! Unfinished projects seem to run in the DNA.
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LMAO
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I’m thinking of mine….
Awesome post! 😘
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Thank you, Ziggy!
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You’re right in everything you said. I’m doing the procrastination dance right now but I’m also trying to get myself motivated. Sometimes I feel crazy inside and don’t know how to stop it. But thank you for sharing this Tiffany – I am going to think on your words, my friend.
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Cara, friction can slow us down yet also like a match it can help to spark us…the challenge can be to take the first step to start the process. Here’s another thought: we often beat ourselves down for not starting, yet I find for me the beat down just keeps me down. What would you tell your best friend in the same situation? Now be your best friend. What do you now say to yourself?
Thank you for the Reblog! I appreciate it.
❤️ Tiffany
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I know, you’re right. I forget too often to treat myself the way I would a dearly loved friend. Thank you for your words.
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I also caught your other post, more ways to love you. ❤️💕
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Reblogged this on The Secret Self and commented:
Good medicine for bruised emotions.
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Breaking it up, only thing that works for me. The perfectionism thing resonates a lot. It fits perfectly with my Dad’s voice in my head, “Can’t you do anything right?” I wish I could turn it off but there isn’t a switch, I have learned to ignore it and over time it has gotten quieter, However, on occasion, it gets really loud! Excellent post Tiff! So when is the book coming out? 😆 Barn
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Barney, glad to here my words here have helped. I’ll let you know re the book! 😉
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Tiffany’s guide to Mindful Living?
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Haha!
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It seems to be an endless battle… A mid-week motivational reminder and spank on the rusty to get moving! 👋💥☺️
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Glad it gave you a spank of motivation. 😉
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Beautifully said Tiffany and reminders I needed this morning as I take one step at a time to get motivated. Sometimes I look too far ahead and feel overwhelmed … need to slow it all down.
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Yes! We have a tendency to try to take off more than we can chew and then want to stop eating, right?! Xoxo
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Yep, absolutely. I’m very guilty of that.
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Me, too!
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Sometimes you read something and it is incredible how it resonates. This post did this for me. I knew I was procrastinating about doing something that, perhaps will have positive results but also might just prove to be the final nail in a coffin. I like how you reframed it. Thank you.
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Oh, you’re so very welcome! Thank you for receiving the message and applying it to you!
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Smiles. Thank you.
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“Another aspect that can cause procrastination involves the belief that what we do needs to be perfect.” Totally get this! Thank you.
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I’ve started to give myself permission to mess things up (drawings, mainly). It’s so freeing! At work I have to walk a very fine line so to be able to make mistakes is what I need. Besides Bob Ross had it right when he created happy trees from his “accidents.” That man was on to something 🙂
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I love it. That is so refreshing. I look forward to reading more of your posts!
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Thank you! And me yours 🙂
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