Sweet Dreams Are Made of These….

A dear friend recently reminded me that I need to write the story to bring a solid partnership into my life. While she first said this over a month ago, it has only been in the last week or so that I finally came to a place where I believed that I am both worthy and capable of having such a partnership.  So here goes, I’ll make a wish as I blow out the candle. 🔥

What I’m sharing here is my vision of my dream partner and our relationship. I know all too well that discord is a necessary part of growth, that relationships require work, and that one person/relationship cannot fulfill all aspects outlined here all of the time. So allow a girl to at least dream…deal?!


The most important quality of this relationship is that when we are together, we feel at home. While we each carry this quality individually, the internal home fires glow more brightly when we are together. As such, we are an anchor of support for one another; a well-grounded type of home base. 

While we are comfortable in our respective skins as well as ourselves as individuals, we can share more of ourselves with the other than we can with any other person. In this way we are best friends. The following traits and qualities help support the partnership.

Characteristics of the relationship:

  • Passionate & Loving. Physical affection is a very important component; it’s truly the best gift for me to receive and to give.
  • A love of learning & teaching; we “Geek out” on overlapping and individual topics. 
  • Erotic/sensual with an openess to exploration. I am doubting my desire to be monogamous long-term. Unsure what this entails for the future – polyamory or just a sexually open relationship…so being open is important for more deeply exploring boundaries.
  • Unmasked. A willingness & desire to be vulnerable even if mostly behind closed doors. 
  • Expressive. We are able to effectively communicate, which includes listening, while exploring emotional, mental and spiritual realms. At times, this includes non-verbal communication, an inner knowing that may not have an explanation.
  • Multi-faceted with a willingness to share different dimensions together.
  • Humanitarian. Working together to help others to better themselves while also looking within to better ourselves, respectively.
  • Free-spirited. Allows for growth, exploration and some level of independence. Now that I’m free, there’s no going back to being tethered, manipulated nor controlled…outside of the “bedroom” that is. 😉
  • Trusting and trustworthy. Honesty is implied. 
  • Physically active and “on the go” at least part of the time. Chillin’ can also be therapeutic.
  • Accountable. We hold each other to higher levels of potentiality.
  • Creative. Required for exploration, whether done together or apart. 
  • Humility with a sense of humor. It is required that we be able to joke one another. 
  • Compassionate. We understand that even the best intentions can be frought with human error. Forgiveness is a huge part of this…
  • Respectful. We don’t always agree, and can still be respectful of the others differences.
  • Resilient. Able to withstand change, pressure and remains true even when put to the test. This takes 2. 

Balanced, the ways in which we offer variation for one another:

  • His Boyish innocence to my practicality.
  • His Dominant to my submissive & vice versa (though we can switch or be neutral from time-to-time)
  • His Protectiveness to my nurturing 
  • Seductive. He is a great kisser whose hands are drawn like magnets to my body. For me, feeling desired is such a huge component to my sexuality (note: as it is for most women). Yet he also gives me the space to be the seductress.

Individual characteristics:

  • Kid-friendly, without wanting more of his own this factory is closed 😉
  • He is a gentleman & doesn’t just play one on TV. 
  • He is intelligent (degrees are not necessary) “Make love to her mind and her body will surely follow.”
  • Somewhat cocky, like salt though, too much can ruin the soup
  • He is 6’2″ or taller (a 5’8.5″ girl can dream, so he’s still taller than me when I’m in my 4″ platform stilettos 👠)
  • He has a truck that’s big enough for me to be challenged to drive…and I know how to drive a stick (my beloved Jeep is a 6-speed, after all…).There may just be a double-entendres or two right there.
  • He has a somewhat muscular build, though without spending most of his spare time in the gym. Icing on the top is for him to look like Tom Welling (again, a girl can dream)
  • Tattoos are also awesome, yet not mandatory 

Here is an excellent summary from a recent card reading: Dutiful, diligent and devoted to a job well done –these are the characteristics of the mature man who is committed to working hard on your behalf and will help you find the answers you seek to your problems (remember, this is a card reading). Don’t be afraid to trust this man. While he may appear to have the head of a dreamer and the heart of a wanderer, beneath that restless spirit lies a deep commitment to humanity and an ocean’s worth of love to offer the right partner.

Interestingly, the queen of the same suit seems to describe me and also appeared in the reading: The woman highlighted in this matter is an achiever who is dedicated, hard-working, and steadfast in her objectives. When an important job needs to be done, she is the one to do it. While she is a visionary at heart and can tend to be swept away by her ideals, she can be practical and pragmatic about life as well. The matter in question will soon take on a new direction through the efforts of such a woman.

So be it.

Image: Hubble & google 

9 thoughts on “Sweet Dreams Are Made of These….

  1. What a great post, Tiffany! I can imagine this was a very productive exercise to clarify your wants and/or needs. Made me think about the song from Alanis Morisette (sp?)–21 Things I Want In a Lover. Your parts around sexual exploration were very arousing and but didn’t dominate your whole person perspective. Well, off to go look for a big truck.😊 If your lover doesn’t have a big truck, perhaps he could find one for you enjoy now and then🔥😉

    Liked by 1 person

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