Today is my birthday and for the first time I am seeing my life as something to celebrate more than to mourn. Instead of fearing life, myself, my gifts and my relationship with myself and my God, I am seeing my life as a gift for myself, from God, for the world.
Yet, from early on I had believed that life was hard; love was hard or if anything was too easy that it was unfulfilling. To feel worthy I believed that I must endure, that I must sweat, labor and toil. I had lost faith in the paths that were high or too easy. I had lost faith in God to provide for me, because I repeatedly choose to see and experience life through the lenses of suffering.
Well, sometimes we have to hit rock bottom to be able to rise up. For it is at the bottom that we can see the roots of our suffering from their point of origin. We can then choose to pluck from our lives the falsehoods; the beliefs that keep us from being reborn. By reborn I mean that each moment and each day is a new opportunity to be and live life differently.
For these reasons, the struggle had been my focus. Believing that the struggle was what gave me strength, I found myself climbing and climbing to no end. Well, that was, until the bottom would drop out and I’d find myself at a new rock bottom, over and over again. Meanwhile, what I’m rediscovering today is that there is no need to struggle. That the struggle is only as real as I make it; as real as I allow it to be. Compassion is the key to release.
- Daily meditation: guided and unguided (the Insight Timer app is amazing)
- Forgiveness: 21 Days to Forgive Everyone for Everything by Iyanla Vanzant has been such an amazing release!
- Self-Care: time off of work, massages, ionic foot detoxes, acupressure, journaling, salt baths, Naturopathy
- Mindfulness: being aware of what emotions are rising up to be acknowledged and then breathing into/being with the emotions in this present moment
- EFT & Constellation Therapy: both help to get to and clear the root causes of the beliefs that suffering is necessary
Yes, there are still beliefs that I’m sorting through and changing, releasing. There are still pangs of fear and insecurity. However, their power over me is lost. They may roll me down the hill, yet I’m quicker to respond to myself with compassion sooner, instead of questioning, resisting or cowering as my faith is stronger than ever that I will survive it.
May each one of us find within ourselves the space to believe in ourselves again. May we find the root causes of our suffering, so that we can respond to ourselves with the compassion that we deserve. May we all be free of anything that prevents our greatest selves from shining upon the world, thus helping to bringing a new dawn to this amazing world.
With each person’s candle that is lit,
we each begin to see more clearly.