How White People Can Put an End to Racism Starting Now

Our necks are precious. They are our lifelines. Major blood vessels travel through the neck, connecting our brains to our hearts. Our trachea, which carries the breath to and from our lungs, also lives here. Our ability to speak, to express ourselves and to live our truths also lives in our neck and throats. We often also hold our burdens and our tension in our necks and shoulders. When the police officer knelt on his neck, George Floyd’s ability to live, breathe and speak were taken away. “Kneeling on the neck bones” is an analogy for how white America, as a whole, has treated people of color and minorities. As a nation, as human beings, we can no longer afford to passively stand by nor actively participate in racism. Here, I will outline how we can begin to heal as individuals and as a nation.

In Lack of Control & The Miracles that Followed

One primary persona of mine is to walk with confidence and appear to be “calm and under control;” the emotions pour out later. In this “mode,” I can hear my father’s mantra to be “calm, cool and collected” reverberating in my cranium. Recently, that persona broke wide the eff open for me. While it’s been an ongoing processContinue reading “In Lack of Control & The Miracles that Followed”

Learning to be Secure

My son was having a difficult time with self-control this evening. Even with knowing the consequences of his behavior, he choose to act out; losing his coveted tablet time for the rest of the day. So there I was, having my feathers ruffled by a 7-year-old throwing a 7-year-old temper tantrum, because I did notContinue reading “Learning to be Secure”

Be the Light

We are here to be the light to show others the way out of the darkness. It is through greater self-acceptance and love that we bring more light into this world. Fear blocks the light and masks keep the light hidden. Judgment is a form of fear that blocks the light from shining through us.Continue reading “Be the Light”

Return to Innocence

There was something inside that I wanted to hide. The true name of what it was that caused my shame was unknown to me. I could see some of the situations from my childhood in which it seemed to be rooted. And I had spent nearly a decade tugging up various “weeds” to get toContinue reading “Return to Innocence”

Healing The Roots of Despair

In talking with my mother about the culture of the county in which she was raised, which I only visited as a child, I have come to a new understanding of some of my habits. It frightens me to be publicly recognized for my achievements. Actually, that applies to any recognition, even one-on-one. Compliments areContinue reading “Healing The Roots of Despair”

Allowing Through Heartache to Let Go

  Heartaches make us through breaking us, for in breaking apart the beliefs that we hold dear, we rebuild ourselves in better and better ways. This can be hard to understand when in the midst of heartbreak, for often we hold onto the pain, or we hold onto the good things that we “lost,” thatContinue reading “Allowing Through Heartache to Let Go”

Becoming a Best Friend

Everyone needs a best friend, someone to turn to when life gets tough and someone with whom to celebrate the good stuff. Friends can come and go, moving to new places, having their own life changes or even passing on. The one person we know that is with us from birth to death is ourContinue reading “Becoming a Best Friend”

The Shame of Success

I won the first round, as we opened the second, I won 3 hands in-a-row. The jokes at the table then began to be directed at me, they knew who would win each hand. This perception felt like a cut, stated somewhat begrudgingly. While I did win the next round, there were others at theContinue reading “The Shame of Success”

The Shame that Hides Us

The voice of shame puts us down and keeps both our darkness and greatness hidden from ourselves and the world. “Who am I to be great?” is as much the voice of shame as “there is something terribly wrong with me.” These, and thoughts like them, keep us isolated and afraid of revealing ourselves.  I’mContinue reading “The Shame that Hides Us”

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