to sit in the muck & the mire
with an ability to be with it all
can feel so much easier ~ contracted
than to sit with the expansive ecstasy
of the things which i desire
the paradox of being this human
strikes again
where did this difficulty feeling
into pleasurable things begin
a query best left alone
to answer it
would require a weighty tome
the digression merely
another futile attempt
to avoid the hot seat
the places i fear to touch
into
the spaces i fear to reach
into
a vessel within holds lessons
to teach
to learn it all
is to sit in the hot seat
the quickening of my breath
into my chest
twice, no thrice
in shallowly
sighing out deeply
a natural attempt to re-set
the stress & strain
on the nervous system
from the threat of
overbearing thoughts in my brain
a sense of forlornness
enters
coldly & deeply
leaves me with chills
even in this summer heat (humidity, too)
another breath expands into my chest
breathing into the contraction
destitute of warmth at my core
rinsing & repeating this breathing
forevermore
yet after just a few moments more
there is a welcomed relaxation
& the ecstasy returns
an intoxication
from a chemical storm that is
completely endogenous
there is a newfound comfort
in this hot seat
in this moment
now just to continue
to rinse & repeatedly
repeat
seemingly
&
endlessly
repeating
the
repeats
lol
{image: pexels}
1. the pull
2. the draw
3. the wave
4. the love
5. the push
6. the lull
7. the well
8. the hand
9. upward spiral
10. weightless
11. ever-longing
12. the hot seat
13. reluctant submission
14. the dive
copyright 2023 & 2024 tiffany c. all rights reserved
Unfiltered from the heart 
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